Chapter 376. Insomnia Smash Project (3)
“I’m going to the military.”
That was the first thing Gong Seok said, having shaved his already short hair down to a buzz cut.
“I originally planned to go right after *Miro Maze* ended, but I guess I was a bit late. I thought about it a lot, but since I have to go anyway, I figured I might as well get it over with now.”
Gong Seok rubbed his now bare scalp awkwardly, seeming uncomfortable with our constant gazes. He pressed down a baseball cap he’d brought with him and smiled, but for some reason, the mood turned solemn.
Frankly, I didn’t know about Lee Doha, but as for me, I felt gloomy.
‘Damn it. The military…’
Unfortunately, if the future I knew was correct, the most frustrating part was that peace and reunification wouldn’t happen in the next ten years. The future I saw was my future, and when I thought about my own eventual military service, the words I was going to say just vanished.
While I was sipping my iced tea with a sullen face, Lee Doha, who seemed just as down, folded his hands and opened his mouth.
“When you come back, will you return?”
It was pointless to ask about life after discharge when he hadn’t even enlisted yet, but Gong Seok seemed to understand the deeper meaning behind Doha’s question.
Gong Seok, who had been quietly looking down at his teacup, shook his head slowly.
“Uh… no. I don’t think I’ll come back.”
Gong Seok was 23 years old this year.
In reality, even if he started preparing for his debut now, considering the average age of rookie idols these days, he would be on the older side. It seemed strange to use the word “late” at such a young, vibrant age, but that was the reality.
‘In an industry with a standard contract term of seven years, if you add in the time spent in the military… Twenty-three is pretty much the limit.’
And now, at that limit, Gong Seok was choosing to enlist.
Since it was the end of June, he’d be discharged at 25. In effect, it was a decision to give up on an idol debut, and Lee Doha’s face darkened noticeably.
Seeing that, perhaps out of fear or awkwardness, Gong Seok hurriedly waved his hands and added,
“I’m not giving up on singing. It’s just, well, I haven’t even graduated yet, and from teaching others, I realized that I’m still lacking. So….”
“…….”
“I thought I could at least clear my head in the military and take my time to think.”
Doha and I nodded silently at Gong Seok’s words. As much as I felt it was a pity, it was ultimately Gong Seok’s life, and it wasn’t my place to interfere.
I simply clasped both of Gong Seok’s hands tightly, like a grandmother holding her grandson’s hands, and spoke sincerely.
“Hyung. When you enlist, there’ll be guys younger than you acting all superior just because they’re your seniors. I know from experience that in that regard, I’m not worried about you at all, given how we worked on that group project together.”
“…Oh? Uh, thanks.”
“But don’t act like a pushover. The moment you look weak, even the juniors will start giving you a hard time. Your build and stamina aren’t bad from all that trainee work, right? Just keep it middle ground. Don’t try too hard, but don’t slack off too much either. Act tough enough so they know not to mess with you, okay? That way you won’t get picked on, and things will go smoothly later.”
“Do… you think I can?”
“If you have to do something, be the first to volunteer, do it right, and get it done properly. I know you’re meticulous, so I’m not too worried. But when it comes to tasks that are physically demanding or seem dangerous, don’t hesitate to bow out. Health is the most important thing. Got it?”
“Ah, yeah. Thanks.”
“Also, make sure to wash up quickly and secure some personal time. The first thing you need to memorize when you get there is your name and service number. Name, got it? There’s always some asshole who’ll make a fuss about that. Especially since your name is Gong Seok, right?”
“Yeah… that’s true.”
“The moment they say ‘Private Gong Seok,’ there’ll definitely be some immature jerk who’ll go, ‘Why is he called *empty* seat when there’s a person here?’ Just ignore them. Reacting means you lose.”
“Oh, okay….”
“And once they find out you were a vocal major aiming to be an idol, they’ll make you sing and dance nonstop for talent shows. You’d be better off singing trot or popular girl group songs rather than ballads, but don’t overdo it. If you’re too good, some lunatics will make you do it constantly, so keep it moderate….”
“…….”
“……….”
“………….”
Ah, crap.
Before I knew it, I had gone overboard.
Both Gong Seok, who asked, “Hajin, have you already completed your military service?” and Lee Doha, who was glaring at me as if to say, “Stop pretending like you’ve been to the military,” were looking at me at the same time. I hurriedly cleared my throat and tried to recover.
“…They say, you know, that it’s important to pick your battles carefully, or so I’ve heard… from my older brother.”
“Hajin, don’t you only have a younger brother?”
“……My cousin.”
Though I was clearly making things up, the innocent Gong Seok just nodded, saying, “I see.” On the other hand, Doha, who almost never stared daggers at me, was now looking at me with a deadpan expression. I thought to myself that if Ji Suho or Lee Yugeon had been here, I’d probably have gotten chewed out on the way home. So, I quietly shut my mouth.
In the oddly solemn atmosphere, Doha finally managed to steer the conversation back to the original topic.
“Anyway, we came here today because we wanted to ask you something about Siwoo hyung.”
“Oh? Ah, right.”
Gong Seok, who had just remembered the original reason for this meeting, nodded. We had already told him about our concerns over the phone, so he immediately began talking about what he knew.
“Well, I only heard bits and pieces from drinking with Siwoo every now and then. I don’t know the details, but… Yeah, it’s true that his father’s memorial is in July.”
“Ah….”
“Remember after *Miro Maze* ended, you guys had a two-week break or something? Siwoo contacted me first, asking if I wanted to go with him. I think I remember him saying that his father passed away just before the weather got hot, after being sick all spring.”
As expected, Jung Siwoo’s trauma was indeed linked to his father. Doha also seemed to understand and let out a small sigh.
“If it’s his father’s memorial, that would definitely affect him.”
“I didn’t live in the dorms with you guys, so I don’t really know what Siwoo was like during that time… But I do remember him drinking a lot. He seemed to be trying to stay around people as much as possible.”
“Oh, then by any chance….”
I recalled that around that time, Jung Siwoo had gone on a retreat with some fellow trainees and ended up knocking everyone out with a drinking game. That’s also why he didn’t attend the first Kairos team bonding session….
It suddenly occurred to me that maybe, even back then, he wanted to lose himself in a crowd and pass the time in a blur. The thought left me uneasy.
‘Wait a second. July? Did you say July?’
I furrowed my brows and asked Gong Seok with a hint of suspicion.
“July—that’s his birthday month, isn’t it? July 4th.”
“Oh, right. Fortunately, it seems like Siwoo spent his last birthday with his dad before he passed. Though, of course, for Siwoo, that might make his birthday even more difficult to face….”
Gong Seok finished his sentence with a bitter smile.
I let out a deep sigh and looked out the window. The company building was already lit up with flashy ads promoting Jung Siwoo’s birthday celebration.
To have his father’s death anniversary coincide with his birthday every year…
I couldn’t claim to fully understand that pain, but I felt a heavy weight settle over me.
“Should we just pretend we don’t know?”
I sincerely asked Gong Seok for advice.
Even though I’m nosy and love meddling, this was a situation I couldn’t just wade into without careful thought.
Gong Seok looked pensive as he replied.
“Well… That might not be the worst idea. But Siwoo is sharp, so he might realize you’re pretending not to know.”
“Hah, true…. He’s one tough hyung.”
Now that we knew, it was only a matter of time before Jung Siwoo figured out that we knew. I dropped my head onto the table with a thunk. The cold surface of the marble helped cool my head, which felt like it was going to split open.
“Just gotta avoid another ‘You Gotta Blame Me’ incident….”
“Huh? What incident?”
“Oh, just the infamous Jung Siwoo outburst incident….”
Then, from above my head, someone let out a lazy laugh and chimed in.
“Isn’t it the Kang Hajin Leader Power Trip incident?”
“Power trip? Come on, what? I’ve lived my whole life as the underdog….”
“Oh, so it was all my fault back then?”
“To be honest, hyung was the one in the wrong first. All I did was ask a question, but then you went ahead and, uh, belittled my intentions, my sincerity….”
“Oh, reeeally?”
“…Yes?”
Wait a minute. Why did that rebuttal sound like it was coming from the person involved?
I doubted my ears as I slowly lifted my head. Gong Seok, sitting across from me, awkwardly laughed and drank his tea without saying a word. Even Lee Doha, who was sitting next to me, averted his gaze and let out a forced cough.
A ‘certain someone’ had placed their hand on my shoulder.
Not from the front, or the side—but from behind.
“So, when you said you were wrong back then, was that just something you didn’t really mean, to smooth things over?”
It was none other than Jung Siwoo.
“Haha…. H-hyung. I thought you had a shoot today. Didn’t you say you wouldn’t be back in Seoul until late tonight…?”
“It ended early. Why, did you miss me?”
“Oh, of course! You know, if I don’t see your face at least once a day, my eyesight starts to get worse by the second. My vision’s terrible without your face to refresh my eyes.”
Jung Siwoo was now fully accustomed to my nonsense and simply chuckled as he sat next to Gong Seok. It seemed like the two of them had been meeting up more often lately, as Gong Seok greeted him with a much more relaxed attitude than before.
“Siwoo, want something to drink? Should I get you a coffee?”
“No, I had a lot during the shoot. You already shaved your head? I said I’d go with you.”
“I’ll have to shave it again the day before I enlist anyway. We can go together then. And you don’t need to come. It’s just the military, everyone has to go.”
As the two older guys chatted casually, Doha and I sat there like guilty criminals.
‘Wait, I didn’t do anything wrong.’
Was this really a mistake? Was it? I’m close with Seok-hyung too. What’s wrong with meeting up with him?
After a brief moment of feeling intimidated, I reminded myself that I had no reason to push myself into the ‘underdog’ position here. Besides, who knew how much of our conversation Jung Siwoo had overheard?
If it came down to it, I could just claim I’d met up with Seok-hyung before he left for the military.
‘Well, since I’ve been caught, I might as well act bold.’
With that decision, I lifted my head confidently. Jung Siwoo, resting his handsome face on his delicate hand, asked,
“So, Hajin and Doha.”
“…….”
“I heard you two have been snooping around about me. Did you get what you wanted?”
“I’m sorry, hyung.”
“What are you sorry for?”
“Just… we’re sorry, hyung….”
What kind of all-seeing god is our resident madman that he knows everything?
Once again, it seemed impossible to escape the palm of Jung Siwoo’s hand. With a resigned sigh, I looked at him and gave my sweetest, most innocent smile.
“Wipe that grin off your face.”
“Yes, sir.”
…Guess I wasn’t smiling sweetly enough.
My bad.