I could barely breathe, unable to respond to Ricardo’s words. But at that moment, his body slumped down.
“Ri, Ricardo?”
“…….”
“Ricardo!”
He still didn’t regain consciousness.
His body was burning like fire.
‘How on earth with a body like this.’
A corner of my heart swelled with guilt.
I should’ve stopped him from coming with me.
Even though I had noticed from the beginning that something was off with Ricardo.
Groaning, I moved his heavy body. Just as I laid him down comfortably and hurried to look for medicine—
“…….”
A hot hand weakly grabbed me. I thought he might have regained consciousness, so I quickly checked on him, but he was still out of it.
I opened my mouth slightly, then tightly held his hand.
“I’m not going anywhere, so just get better quickly.”
Did he hear me? The strength in the hand holding me slowly loosened.
‘There must be medicine somewhere…….’
I searched the cave thoroughly and found a box full of herbs not far away.
Rustle.
As I picked up the herbs, a single sheet of paper fell to the ground.
[There’s a monster living on the timeline. Its identity hasn’t been revealed yet, but I discovered a few facts.
1. It cherishes humans.
2. It’s a being that doesn’t harm humans.
Even to an adventurer like me, it acts generously—it’s clear.
Though it behaves like a mischievous fairy, it sometimes gives me things I’ve never seen before. I have no idea what it’s thinking.
Damus – Hemostatic? (Didn’t die after using it. So far.)
Bristol – Seems to stop the pain. (Or maybe I only imagined the pain was gone.)]
Next to the writing was a rough drawing. Thankfully, it was enough to identify the herbs.
[However, there’s one item whose use I couldn’t figure out.
It changes its shape often and moves as if it’s alive.
The monster told me it’s a path to the ‘library,’ but I still don’t know what it’s for.
(To be honest, I’m wondering if it gave me a haunted item. As a prank.)]
It was a drawing attempted many times but left incomplete. It seemed too difficult to depict, so everything was just lines.
Then, all the trophies he had collected—had they all been given by the being he called a monster?
‘No, this isn’t the time to be thinking about that.’
Holding the herbs, I went back to Ricardo.
By then, cold sweat was drenching his burning forehead.
“……This is really too much.”
Biting my lip, I removed his upper garments.
“When did I ever say I needed your help?”
A voice filled with resentment slipped out.
“We’re nothing to each other. If what happened that day is still weighing on your mind……”
Just as I said that and tried to wipe down Ricardo’s back, I froze. I had discovered the countless scars that remained on his back.
* * *
Ricardo had wanted to become an adult as soon as possible. If he did, the milestones of life would surely appear.
But the child who resembled Harnen walked the same path as him.
There was no end to revenge.
Even so, his eyes became blinded by the light that had quietly seeped in, and for the first time, he wanted to breathe.
〈After you return the power of Eileens to me, what will you want, Duke?〉
He had wanted to show Harnen that curses didn’t exist in this world.
After that, he had planned to die.
Ending the seed of revenge—there was no other way.
But greed had begun to bloom.
He wanted to prove that he wasn’t like Harnen.
Though he had grown up soaked in twisted love, he had still become someone different.
To someone, who had grown up loved, he didn’t want to show his shortcomings.
He constantly checked himself, fearing he might act like Harnen in front of someone, who had grown up so beautifully.
He had wanted to be perfect. But now he knew. That moment would never come.
He had always been a misfortune to her.
He had sworn not to become like Harnen, yet somehow, without even realizing it, he had begun to resemble him.
If only their starting points had been different.
Would something have changed?
No, there had been many chances to start over from the beginning.
When she sent that apology letter, he should’ve run straight to her and said it was okay.
Even the day she and Idette fell into the lake, he should’ve held onto her and explained that he didn’t save her out of spite.
The day they met again in Dians, he should’ve said he was happy to create precious memories with her.
When she was alone, hearing whispers that her fiancé had abandoned her, if he had just held her hand and apologized.
On the day she smiled brightly at him, if only he had told her that she looked beautiful.
The one who had missed countless chances—was none other than himself.
That’s why he couldn’t forgive himself.
Crackle.
At that moment, a spark leapt up.
“……Where is this?”
Somehow, the sun had set, and darkness surrounded them, except for the campfire lighting up the cave.
He ground his teeth briefly, then found Bianca asleep, still holding his hand.
“……!”
His pupils shook violently. But soon he became aware of his condition. Over the hideous scars he so desperately wanted to hide from her, sticky ointment had been applied.
Fear surged up.
…She would surely see him as a monster.
Just like his mother had, long ago.
He wanted to bolt from this place right away. He didn’t think he could hold on any longer.
But the hand holding him stopped him.
He could hear her quiet breathing. The eyes that were always sharp when they looked at him were now soft.
…He didn’t know why. Even though he knew that those eyes would soon be filled with hatred again—
Why couldn’t he run away?
‘Maybe it doesn’t matter anymore.’
Ricardo reached for the woman.
Maybe because of a bad dream, tears had gathered at the corner of her eyes.
He gently wiped them away.
At that moment, he wished she would wake and look at him.
“……”
She opened her eyes.
They were clear and vivid—though damp with tears, they were more sincere than anyone else’s.
Her gaze made it hard for him to breathe again. It felt like he was being strangled, yet somehow, it felt pleasant.
He wanted to fall with her, dragging her down.
But at the same time, he wanted to take her to a place high above, where she belonged.
He didn’t know how to rid himself of this desire.
…When he thought of her, he just felt like crying.
* * *
The cave was filled with the sound of the crackling fire.
I was the first to break the silence.
“There were still some herbs left in the cave, thankfully.”
Then, while checking the bandages on his shoulder, I continued.
“I’m not a doctor, so make sure you get proper treatment as soon as we get back to the estate.”
But Ricardo just stared at me.
“Answer me, now.”
At my insistence, he finally nodded.
“…I’ll check later.”
Of course, knowing what Ricardo was like, I didn’t trust him easily.
Then, in a reluctant voice, he asked,
“Later?”
“Yes.”
“……”
“I just… I can’t live with a debt hanging over me.”
I replied quietly, picking up some herbs. As I approached his back, Ricardo spoke firmly.
“I’m fine.”
He reached for his clothes, trying to put them on. I grabbed them at the same time.
“You might be fine.”
“I don’t lie.”
“Who said you did?”
I tightened my grip and pulled. Apparently, Ricardo didn’t have the strength in his shoulder, and the clothes slipped from his grasp.
“Wounds on your back are usually hard to see. Only someone watching you will notice them.”
“……”
“So isn’t that why you fixated on my scars, too?”
Ricardo froze at my words.
“I learned it from you, so don’t try to dodge the question.”