Chapter 18
“Mom, why am I the weakest in our family? I thought Ebenkera blood was supposed to be strong. Shouldn’t I have some kind of ability? Eden could make sword aura from age three!”
When I was little, everything felt unfair.
My useless legs, my lack of talent, and the environment that gave me such exceptional comparisons.
“Sigrin.”
“Mom and Dad’s genes discriminated against me!! It’s unfair!! I’m a failure!! The world hates me!! The world only revolves around big brother!! I’m so miserable!! I’m so pitiful!!”
“Sigrin. Don’t talk weakly.”
“I am weak!! I’m gonna talk weakly!! Waaah!!”
I screamed with a cracked voice, crying. Still unsatisfied, I wheeled my chair around Mom in circles.
Mom put her foot in the wheelchair’s wheel.
Clunk!
“Mom!! Are you okay?? S-Sorry…”
“Sigrin, are you only going to stop after hurting Mom?”
Mom cupped my tear-streaked face, wiping my eyes with her thumbs.
“If your body is weak, you need to appear strong and steadfast outwardly, Sigrin. Especially you, with many enemies, can’t afford to talk weakly. Don’t make it a habit.”
Mom placed her hand on my chest, speaking with a voice full of conviction.
“Because you’re actually stronger than anyone.”
My beautiful, strict mother.
Her advice didn’t resonate with me, and I often let it go in one ear and out the other. But after she was killed, her words sank deep into my heart.
Even with a weak body, I tried to cultivate other strengths to make my words carry weight.
After that, I didn’t show much when I was hurt. I didn’t want to seem weak and give anyone a chance to exploit it.
Maybe that’s why?
Having been subtly emotionally suppressed since childhood, I…
✦ ✦ ✦
‘Wow, he’s about to cry from shame over being a beggar. That’s so sad and cute.’
Twinkle, twinkle.
My eyes, swallowing the lantern’s light, sparkled as I held back an exclamation.
That’s right.
Having grown up suppressed, I was always drawn to kids who seemed weak or unstable.
‘He’s got a side like Apple, unexpectedly.’
Honestly, I only wanted a casual, acquaintance-level relationship with fight-crazy Luca, nothing more or less. But now, I wanted to get as close to him as I was with Apple.
As Luca lowered his head further, I spoke up in a panic.
“Uh, uh. Don’t cry! Don’t cry! I’m bad at sincere comforting, and if I say more, I might just hurt you more!”
“…I’m not crying.”
He brushed back his golden bangs, revealing his flushed forehead.
He looked like he was about to cry, but there were no tears in his eyes.
“I’m this old; I’m not gonna cry over something like this. It’s just embarrassing.”
“You could cry.”
“I’m not crying.”
“Then don’t cry.”
“I said I’m not crying.”
Clink, clink.
An awkward silence hung between us as our hands busied themselves.
I glanced at Luca, his face bright red, and spoke.
“Everyone has parts of themselves they feel ashamed of.”
“…”
Luca glanced at me.
“So?”
“Just that they do. It’s interesting that even strong, confident Luca has something like that.”
I set the mood like I was about to give some comforting wisdom, but ended up just analyzing him.
“…Are you making fun of me?”
“No, I mean I’m not grossed out even if you’re a beggar.”
“…”
“Honestly, we just met, so there’s nothing to be grossed out about.”
“Can’t you be less blunt?”
“Sorry. If you want to cry, you can lean on my shoulder. I’ve got a shoulder for my lackey.”
“I said I’m not crying.”
Clink, clink.
Our hands moved busily under the lantern.
Luca glanced at me again.
I helped a bit more, but when I started dozing off, he carried me to bed.
✦ ✦ ✦
I…
I really couldn’t figure Sigrin out.
She gathered a crowd and turned a fight into a spectacle, water-tortured someone who’d lost the will to fight to make them her lackey, and asked to be pulled around in a rickshaw because she didn’t want to walk.
She awkwardly comforted me when she noticed my shame, and helped with my work even if it was just for show.
I didn’t know her well, but she seemed like a huge weirdo.
‘Still, she’s stupidly kind to her lackeys.’
I’d heard mafia types were like that.
The boss takes care of the family members’ livelihoods, and the family members fight to the death for the boss. The tight bonds among mafia family members were well-known even in the Aurum Empire.
Yesterday, she probably acted that kindly to manage her new lackey’s loyalty.
Recalling last night, I rubbed my neck. We didn’t talk much, but it felt oddly embarrassing.
‘That’s how she tamed Apple.’
I thought Apple’s excessive loyalty came purely from fear, but maybe not entirely.
[“If you want to cry, you can lean on my shoulder. I’ve got a shoulder for my lackey.”]
What’s that? I feel like I got tamed.
It’s only been a day; does that make sense?
I kept trying to relive the humiliation of the water torture to hold onto it, but a few words last night melted my heart.
If it weren’t for that damn face!
At this rate, I might end up blindly following any order Sigrin gives.
I resented myself for being so easily swayed by a pretty face.
‘Drümuel, get it together.’
It wasn’t how I wanted, but getting close to someone I’d liked since we met made my heart unreasonably soft.
Thankfully, after sleeping, my head cleared up.
‘She asked me to keep pulling the rickshaw.’
To refuse overstepping orders later, I should do a lot of menial tasks now.
I couldn’t just do nothing as a lackey.
By sticking around, I’d challenge her to a rematch when the opportunity arose.
I had no hobby of staying someone’s lackey forever.
‘Her as my lackey… That’d be fun.’
I woke up early, washed up quickly, and dragged out the cart I’d used before, waiting outside.
✦ ✦ ✦
“Hm, what’s this?”
I looked at the cart with a baffled expression. It was piled high with soft beast hides.
“Your carriage. Hop on.”
“You didn’t have to…”
“You said you didn’t want to walk, so I should carry you.”
“Gasp, Miss, you said that?”
“That was just for that moment…”
“Uh, uh, Miss! I’ll lift the cart a bit when there’s a rock or something!”
Even Apple, with an uneasy look, joined in and rushed to the back of the cart. They all seemed determined not to move until I got on.
Having been carried around a lot in my life, I felt a bit out of place but sat down familiarly.
‘Whatever. My stamina’s trash, so good is good.’
Honestly, the uphill and downhill paths to the library were a bit daunting. The side effects from the last fight left me with mild dizziness too.
“Rock ahead.”
“Up! Miss, you okay?”
“Yeah, thanks.”
…Let’s admit it.
Apple seemed to consider herself my lackey too. If Luca joined as a lackey, Apple, who was secretly scared of him, wouldn’t stay my friend.
Did she even see me as a friend to begin with?
I recalled Apple’s excessive kindness, which I’d ignored until now.
Ugh, I don’t know. We’re all friends anyway.
‘They’re just doing this because they want to.’
Haha!
Hahaha…
Well, if it’s convenient, it’s fine.
✦ ✦ ✦
“Wow, what’s that??”
Two students were pulling a cart like oxen.
On the cart sat a girl with pale green hair and green eyes, legs crossed.
Most people would feel awkward having peers pull them in a cart. They’d also get flustered under everyone’s stares.
But the girl on the cart accepted it all naturally.
Her haughty expression and posture made the bizarre scene feel seamless.
“…Must be sorting out the hierarchy. After the big fight, the power structure’s definitely flipped.”
“Luca, that crazy guy, pulling a rickshaw? Look, her old lackey joined in too.”
“I heard she subdued Luca without a weapon and water-tortured him. He looks completely reprogrammed.”
“Man, even royalty wouldn’t get treatment like that.”
I, lounging comfortably on the cart, spoke up.
“Luca, can you stop by the item storage for a bit? I need to grab my weapon case.”
“Sure.”
“Miss! I’ll get it! The black violin case, right?”
“…Thanks, everyone.”
“Hehe.”
The watching students’ jaws wouldn’t close.