Chapter 75: R.O.B.O.T.！！！
Lu Zheng’s pixel screen flashed with an angry emoticon.
What the hell was up with this damn robot?
How could it slander him so baselessly?
He tossed the cup in his hand a few times and flung it at the nearby camera, smashing it to the ground.
Judging by its sorry state, it clearly couldn’t function anymore.
The robot glanced at the fallen camera, its eyes blinking.
“Can’t handle me so you’re taking it out on the camera? Can’t keep it together, huh. You’re totally triggered.”
“That’s enough.”
Lu Zheng’s pixel screen now showed a sweat-drop emoji.
What was this—an abstract internet troll robot?
It had been all docile in front of Yi Ning, but now that she was gone, its true colors came out?
Faced with Lu Zheng’s sweat-drop attack, the robot replied with a single word:
“Classic.”
Its eyes flashed again.
“And this is the guy who thinks he can stop the great Dr. Alien? That’s hilarious.”
Confronted with a robot that had thoroughly mastered the six noble arts of internet trolling—“triggered, pressed, classic, amused, snapped, winning”—Lu Zheng couldn’t be bothered to argue anymore.
He crooked his finger at the robot.
“Come here, I want to talk.”
His pixel screen showed a smiling face, as if he really wanted to have a friendly chat.
There was no trace of killing intent anywhere on him.
The robot didn’t sense anything either.
It stepped forward a few paces, eyes flashing, and continued its mocking tirade, completely unaware that it was about to meet its end.
“Trying to convert me? Dream on! I’ll never betray my great creator, Dr. Alien. You don’t understand Dr. Alien at all. I advise you not to jump to conclusions about someone you don’t—”
“Die! You dumbass robot!”
Before it could finish, Lu Zheng lunged out of the water, right hand forming a blade, and stabbed it straight through the chest.
With a loud bang, the robot was impaled clean through.
Black oil gushed from the hole in its chest.
“You… no sense of honor… sneak-attacking a one-day-old robot…”
Its eyes flickered as it uttered its final words.
Then, Lu Zheng swung his hand-blade sideways, slicing the robot in half at the waist.
He shook the black oil from his right hand, moved it away from the hot spring, and scooped some water with his left to try washing the oil off.
Unfortunately, spa water wasn’t strong enough to clean mechanical grease, so he gave up with a sigh.
Guess this hand wasn’t going back in the water.
Lu Zheng sighed lightly.
To think he had to dirty his hands for something like this.
Felt like a loss.
He turned to the robot corpse on the shore, lifted the upper half with his oil-stained right hand, and weighed it.
Might as well recoup a bit of value.
“This weight’s not bad.”
He grinned at the remaining cameras.
“Let’s put you to some good use one last time.”
Saying that, Lu Zheng hurled the robot’s upper body at a camera, smashing it to pieces.
Then he picked up the other half and aimed for another camera.
Just then, Yi Ning stepped out of the changing room, having finished changing clothes.
“What are you doing?”
She looked at the half robot in Lu Zheng’s hand, confused.
“You smashed that robot?”
Because Lu Zheng was holding the robot so conspicuously, she didn’t notice the broken cameras right away.
But she didn’t seem particularly concerned about the robot either.
“That thing was too abstract. Probably started mouthing off as soon as I left.”
She strolled over and casually chatted.
“I never should’ve taken the lazy route and dumped its learning data straight off the internet. Came back and it’s turned into some online gremlin.”
“Meh, smashed is smashed.”
Yi Ning looked utterly indifferent.
She’d been annoyed with that robot for a while—just hadn’t had the heart to dispose of it, since it was her creation.
So heartless—after all that loyalty, too.
“So I’ll go ahead and keep smashing?”
Lu Zheng looked at her.
“Smash what?”
Yi Ning didn’t quite follow.
Lu Zheng pretended to misunderstand and, before she could say more, flung the remaining half of the robot at another camera.
Smash!
The camera shattered on impact.
Yi Ning instinctively looked in the direction he threw, only to see the shattered remains of her poor equipment.
“My So○y PXW-Z750 camera!”
Clutching her head with both hands, Yi Ning screamed in grief.
But it wasn’t over.
She shifted her gaze slightly—and spotted two more wrecked cameras.
“You broke three of them?!”
“Do you know how much evil funding I skimmed to buy those three cameras?!”
She marched up to Lu Zheng and pointed at him with her index finger in heartbreak.
Then, feeling the index finger wasn’t enough to show her fury, she hesitated for two seconds, then switched to her middle finger.
“Uh… were they expensive?”
Lu Zheng asked tentatively.
“I sorted the shopping app by descending price, you think?”
“…Want me to pay you back?”
Although she said that, Lu Zheng wasn’t in the habit of buying expensive stuff online, nor did he ever sort by descending price.
In his mind, the priciest online stuff was just a few tens of thousands.
Multiply by three.
Probably around a hundred thousand total.
He could manage that with his salary.
“You’re pretty decent, huh.”
Yi Ning handed him yet another “Nice Guy” card.
But she didn’t actually plan on making him pay.
“Forget it, I’ll just embezzle a bit more next time.”
She said something outrageous in the most casual tone.
Watching her talk so openly, Lu Zheng couldn’t help quietly reminding her:
“We’re still streaming, you know.”
Wasn’t it bad to admit to misappropriating funds live?
Too bad Yi Ning didn’t care at all.
“So what?”
She completely ignored the floating question marks and inquiries about the embezzlement on screen, turning her head away with a dismissive snort.
Everyone in the I Love Savory Tofu Pudding Association knew she embezzled evil funds all the time.
But did anyone dare complain?
It had become an unspoken rule in the organization.
Plus, everyone else in the group was just as much of a disaster as her.
No point in one clown mocking another.