Chapter 239. When a Workaholic Leader Takes Power (8)
Now, the scene shifts back to a few days earlier.
This was right after Jung Siwoo had left the convenience store, and Kang Hajin was returning alone to the dorm.
“Ha, I can’t believe this….”
At that time, Kang Hajin’s emotions were incredibly complex and detailed, yet also contradictory.
First, he got angry, then he felt a bit hurt, but then he felt sorry, understood the situation, and eventually circled back to, ‘But wasn’t he the one who started it…?’ This emotional cycle repeated about twenty-seven times.
“What? What I need is Main Vocal Jung Siwoo? Then is he Main Vocal Jung Siwoo or Main Dancer Jung Siwoo? What, did I have nothing better to do than sit there in the middle of the night eating ramen? I also took a risk, you know. I was trying to make a gesture in my own way.”
To understand this rollercoaster of emotions, it was necessary to first understand the background of the person known as Kang Hajin.
Although, just by looking at his face, one might think he lived his life doing whatever he wanted, unconcerned with ranks or hierarchy, as mentioned earlier, Kang Hajin was very accustomed to a life defined by ranks and hierarchy.
At the same time, he was also one of the greatest victims of that culture of ranks and hierarchy.
“After all, he’s older than me, right? And he’s the eldest in our group! Just because I wear the leader’s badge doesn’t mean I can treat him carelessly, right? Have I only heard once or twice in my life that I’m a brat acting tough just because I have a title? How many times have I heard that I’m not the only one who’s great and that I shouldn’t think only of myself? …Of course! I know he’s not the kind of person who would say that. But still! From my perspective! It’s natural to be cautious!”
As everyone acknowledged, Kang Hajin had shown intelligence and brilliance far beyond his peers from a very young age. However, despite that, young Hajin faced one dilemma.
It was when ‘my superior does a worse job than me,’ and conversely, when ‘I end up disrespecting others because I show off too much.’
“If he knew how sensitive I am to the word ‘overstepping,’ that hyung would be really surprised, you know?”
During the days when he had not yet mastered the art of social tact, Kang Hajin did not know how to reveal his ‘wisdom’ wisely. As a result, he had to clash with many people over a long period.
And those ‘clashes’ provided the nutrients that helped Hajin grow, but they also scratched his heart. After ‘that incident’ at KD Entertainment, Hajin had become fearful of being hated by others, so it was inevitable.
“I’m really terrified of things like that. What if I disrespected someone without knowing it again, or what if I infringed on that person’s authority, so they got upset? Why? Why~? Because it wasn’t just one or two people who got hurt and angry because of my crappy personality!”
Feeling like the resentment hadn’t subsided, Hajin stopped in his tracks and ran a hand through his hair. His hair, darkened from filming, slipped smoothly through his fingers.
“But I, despite all that! Spoke up! I told him!! The fact that it was such a big challenge for me, and that he would understand that, is why I feel so much more hurt, you know?”
As Hajin yelled as if he were about to announce their argument to the whole neighborhood, the person on the other end of the phone, who had been quietly listening, finally responded.
-Hmm…. Yeah, but Hajin, you’re completely alone right now, right? No people around, no possibility of eavesdropping or recording? If not, you might want to call Seojin and get her to prepare an article denying the rumors of discord within Kairos.
The voice expressing concern with a tone of weariness belonged to Ji Suho, the head of Miro, and currently, Kang Hajin’s only confidant. At Suho’s extremely realistic response, Hajin, thinking that Suho’s MBTI must definitely be xSTx, answered curtly.
“Don’t worry. Even if a stalker or a reporter were glued to my side, they wouldn’t be able to hear this.”
As he spoke, he glanced at the system window floating nearby, which had lost its friendly touch since Thirteen had disappeared.
[The Fixed Regressor has been detected engaging in a somewhat risky conversation.]
[The Fixed Regressor Protection Program is running in real-time.]
[Certain conversations are being retransmitted in everyday language.]
“…It’s convenient, but it’s not very endearing.”
-What did you say?
“Nothing. Anyway, the point is, I’m really mad right now.”
-Well, I’m actually glad that one of our artists isn’t hiding any conflicts between members.
“Hang in there. I usually talk about this stuff with my mom or Hawon, but since it involves past lives, I can’t do that anymore.”
When Hajin, who was truly in a foul mood, grumbled, Ji Suho let out a thoughtful ‘hmmm….’ It sounded like he was pondering what to say.
Hajin hadn’t been expecting any answers, he just wanted to vent his frustration, so he was about to wrap up the conversation when Suho spoke again, coaxing him in a gentle voice.
-C’mon…. Just let it go~
“…Director, are you trying to sound like you’re asking me to forgive a nephew who broke my figurine and stole my game console during the holidays…?”
Despite Hajin’s words, full of betrayal, Suho mumbled ‘no~’ and trailed off. Though Hajin couldn’t see him, he could imagine Suho pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose, probably after removing his glasses.
-But are you really going to get serious with a twenty-two-year-old kid?
“I’m twenty!”
-But you said you were twenty-nine the first time you time-warped. So, mentally, you’re at least 10 years older, aren’t you?
“That…”
Hajin, who had been about to argue, stopped. Come to think of it, that was undeniably true.
-Well. I do think that lately, you seem more like an actual twenty-year-old compared to before. It’s good to see.
It was true.
These days, Hajin had almost forgotten that he was literally living the life of an old soul with the experience of twenty-nine-plus years. Or rather, it might be more accurate to say that he had never been aware of it.
And that was probably proof that the mental care program provided by the system was working successfully.
As Hajin stood there, realizing that he had unconsciously become quite integrated with his ‘base personality’ of being twenty years old, he fell silent.
-Still, Siwoo might have gone to college and had some social experience compared to the other trainees…. But he’s just a kid who grew up in the competitive society of a practice room. Of course, he’ll make mistakes and be immature.
“……”
-Lately, I noticed that Siwoo still seems cautious around Seok even when they occasionally meet at the company. After all, he’s an idol and Seok is now a company employee. If you think about it that way, Siwoo must be feeling pretty lonely too, always having to be careful around the people he wants to be friends with.
Words could be so powerful that once the dam was broken, everything spilled out like water bursting through a crack. Suho, recalling what he knew about Siwoo’s upbringing, spoke cautiously but clearly to Hajin.
-Siwoo’s mother is also famous in the classical music world, right? I don’t know the details, but… I just feel like Siwoo must have had a tough time since he was young. The thought that your very existence could become someone else’s inferiority complex… I’ve never experienced that, so I wouldn’t really know, but still.
By the time Hajin had heard that much, he could feel the tangled emotions within him dissolving like cotton candy in water.
Amidst the flow of thoughts in his mind, a realization emerged.
It was like finally understanding the enigmatic words Taeil had spoken.
The ones telling him to see Jung Siwoo as Jung Siwoo.
-I think this was something the two of you would have had to address eventually. You’re still the leader, and Siwoo will always be the eldest. So, rather than sorting out hierarchy, it’s more like… yeah, you need to refine your communication style.
“……”
-I hope you think it over and reconcile well. Preferably before your next official schedule.
And so, Kang Hajin holed himself up in his room.
After all, when he saw Jung Siwoo, he felt anger, but when he tried to express that anger, it subsided awkwardly. But the idea of apologizing just felt too unsettling, so time passed with nothing resolved.
To make matters worse, Jung Siwoo’s openly cold attitude made Hajin’s slightly softened heart grow hard again, as he started thinking, ‘No, but that hyung really…?’
‘Reconcile? You have to fight to reconcile. This isn’t even a fight, and it’s not a reconciliation either.’
Even as he thought that, Hajin kept thinking. He thought until his head was about to explode.
Although he was aware that his roommate Doha, as well as Taehyun and the other members, were all watching the situation, he was so preoccupied that he didn’t have the capacity to consider their feelings.
‘Anyway…. I need to have another conversation with him.
But if I do it like last time, it’ll just be a disaster all over again…. And pretending to apologize will backfire with him.’
It was at that very moment, when Kang Hajin was thinking and overthinking until his head was about to explode but still hesitant to take any action, that Dan Haru suddenly appeared, carrying a pillow as if he had decided to move into Hajin’s room temporarily.
“……? Sparkling, what are you doing? Where’s Doha?”
“Taehyun hyung declared a strike against being Siwoo hyung’s roommate, so I’m your roommate for the time being!”
But why does that make you my roommate…?
Hajin thought of something similar to what his peer roommate might have thought.
And in the very next moment.
At that very moment when he saw Dan Haru awkwardly placing his pillow on Doha’s bed with a determined expression—, a bolt of realization struck Hajin like lightning.
‘Ah, crap. I need to stop the regression, don’t I…?’
I’m supposed to be fighting tooth and nail against an endless regression by that bunny warrior, struggling to prevent the soul from being trapped and the body from being possessed, all while maintaining the facade of an #SF #modern fantasy #idol #misunderstanding #time-loop genre, right?
If Thirteen were still around, it would have thought Hajin deserved a round of applause for summarizing it so well. With that thought, a cold sweat ran down Hajin’s back.
Just the thought that the baby bunny warrior, who was as sensitive to conflict and arguments as he was, might have been rewinding time without Hajin knowing, made him feel like he could grab Jung Siwoo’s hand and play a game of rock-paper-scissors right then and there, trauma and all.
‘Is this how Ji Suho felt when I said I had regressed over ten times…?’
Hajin, who had only experienced regression but never been aware of it, found that merely recognizing the possibility without knowing for sure brought a whole new level of fear.
Feeling a sense of urgency at the thought that he might not even know if some jerk took over his precious maknae’s body, Hajin snapped back to attention. Meanwhile, Dan Haru, who had neatly arranged his bed and was now sitting on it, looked at Hajin with particularly bright eyes.
“…What? Do you have something to say?”
Unable to ignore Haru’s gaze, Hajin cautiously asked.
Without a word, Haru just nodded. But he seemed hesitant about how to start the conversation. Hajin, as if awaiting a final verdict, sat in the corner of the bed, bracing himself for what Haru was about to say.
Finally, as if he had mustered up his courage, the little bunny warrior straightened his shoulders and solemnly declared in a dignified voice.
“Hyung. I’m on your side!”
…Huh?
Hajin, who had been feeling incredibly tense, found his thoughts clouded with confusion as Dan Haru, the shining young regressor, continued to speak confidently.
“So, when you fight with Siwoo hyung, I’ll help you!”
It was the baby bunny warrior’s declaration of war.