Chapter 181
[First week of August, this week’s number one is… Steel Blue!]
Back at the dorm, when everyone was asleep.
I came out to the living room once again.
I replayed the clip from the music show we appeared on today.
Week 4 of our promotions.
We extended our activities by one week more than the originally planned three weeks.
And today was the day we wrapped up promotions for this album.
No one complained about the extended activities.
Rather, all the members tried hard to hold back tears of joy.
Three consecutive weeks at number one.
Since the music show reform, it has become very difficult to stay at number one for more than two weeks these days.
This was truly a meaningful record.
Our song was still number one on the music sites.
The album was steadily selling as well.
Give me a memory that doesn’t end
Tell me that
Our scorching days
Will never end
Eternal Summer
No Longer Wait
Hearing it sung in someone else’s voice, not mine.
When would I get used to it?
In fact, Steel Blue’s song was slightly different from Baek Nokha’s song.
The lyrics were different, and it was slightly rearranged to suit the members’ vocal colors.
Perhaps that’s why, when I watched the stage.
After returning to my world… more than anything, I thought I would miss the members’ singing.
The stage, which already felt large, would feel even larger.
When I was Baek Nokha, the burden of filling the stage alone was immense.
But while promoting as Steel Blue, I never once felt the emptiness of the stage.
I pressed the rewind button.
[Today marks… our fifteenth number one. Thank you so much. This album, as you all know, was made for, that is, for Everblue. Did you all notice?]
The fans waved their light sticks happily at Seo Baek-young’s question.
Soon, Seo Baek-young’s acceptance speech continued.
[Thank you for giving us an everlasting season like an eternal flame. Even when I get very, very old… I think I will never forget this summer. Steel Blue will continue to strive to give Evers such seasons and joy. And….]
Seo Baek-young looked at me as she spoke.
I was almost busy hugging the other members to hold back my tears.
[Cheong, who worked hard to plan the entire album, Geum, who created beautiful songs, Juhong, who worked hard planning our concept, and Bo-ra, who directed the best promotional film for this album. I’m so proud of our members. I… I don’t know how happy and thrilled I am to be Steel Blue. You’ll be Steel Blue with me forever, right?]
The members nodded, holding back tears.
Among them, I was nodding too.
Why make a promise you can’t keep.
Foolish Baek Nokha.
“Unnie.”
“Ugh!!”
Ah, I was startled.
“Unnie, what are you doing awake?”
Yeon Juhong had somehow approached me and was watching me.
Oh dear.
You startled me, really.
“Why did you come without a sound?!”
“I mean… I made a lot of noise, but Cheong didn’t notice!”
“…Really?”
If so, I have nothing to say.
“It’s 3 AM now. Why aren’t you asleep and watching our number one video? Do you like it that much?”
“Of course, I do.”
“Well, I like it that much too.”
Yeon Juhong laughed with her eyes puffy from just waking up.
Oh dear.
You really seem clueless about everything.
“Still, you need to sleep, Cheong. We have to start preparing for our concert from tomorrow.”
“Right.”
“For me.”
Yeon Juhong rubbed her eyes.
“I like our album’s initial third place, the three weeks at number one… all of it. But I love preparing for the concert the most, Cheong.”
“Why?”
“Just. It’s like an idol’s dream. To sing in front of a packed concert hall.”
That’s right.
The feeling when you’re number one can’t be compared to anything else.
But stepping into a concert hall for the first time brings a completely different level of joy.
“But sometimes… it makes me anxious.”
“Anxious?”
“What if I don’t do well? What if I cause trouble for our unnies?”
“You still think like that?”
Our timid maknae.
Sometimes she seems the strongest and fiercest.
And at times like this, she’s just the quintessential maknae.
“Everyone praises your skills now.”
“That’s because I have you unnies… they just praise me together with you.”
“That’s not true. Your skills are your own.”
It wasn’t just that, Yeon Juhong had really made remarkable progress.
Yeon Juhong
Singing: 75/100
Dancing: 80/100
Appearance: 95/100
Talent: 98/100
Variety Sense: 91/100
Personal Special Ability:
Celebrity (87/100)
Fan Service (82/100)
? (?/100)
Recommended Skills to Develop:
Celebrity
Fan Service
Singing
Dancing
Because all her skills were flying high with wings.
“More than anything… you pretty much planned this concept. You were the one tagging along with Bo-ra, adding the mise-en-scène.”
All the goods included in the album specifications were ideas from Yeon Juhong.
It was both pitiful and commendable to see her struggling daily, holding onto SNS to understand the fans’ needs.
“Well… I really wanted to do it.”
“Did you?”
I was worried she might be feeling the burden of having to contribute as much as everyone else.
“I like you, unnies.”
Yeon Juhong yawned and leaned her head on my shoulder.
She was still a child.
Seeing her unable to fight off sleepiness.
“When I see you unnies, I just think… this would look really good on them… Baek-young unnie is tall, so she would look really, really cool in this… and Cheong unnie’s eyes are so pretty, so if we highlight them like this… I think about things like that all the time. Actually, I think I always think about those things.”
“So, it wasn’t something you tried to do; it just came naturally.”
“Yeah. I just wanted to do everything for you. I know how cool and amazing you are, unnies. I wanted others to see that too.”
Such a commendable thought.
All the melancholy from before disappeared.
A smile crept onto my face.
I wondered if this was the joy of raising children.
“So, for this concept too… I imagined what it would have been like if I had gone to high school with you, unnies. Because I didn’t go to high school.”
That’s right.
Yeon Juhong dropped out of high school shortly after enrolling to pursue her dream.
She must have passed the GED by now.
Even though it was for her dream, the thought that she gave up an important time in her life always weighed heavily on my heart.
“But I don’t regret not going to high school or feel sad about it.”
“Why? You would have been super popular in high school. It would have been really fun.”
“Well, from what mom says, school memories are fun because of good friends and various events that can happen at school, right?”
I didn’t answer.
After all, I only attended school up to middle school….
Both Yoon Cheong and Baek Nokha were the same.
Both barely attended middle school, had no friends.
“That’s right.”
“You didn’t go to school either, so why are you acting like you know?”
“…I can’t say I don’t know either.”
“That’s true too?”
Yeon Juhong giggled.
“I’ll think of spending my school days with you, unnies. And various events? We’ve experienced a lot more of those. School friends might have fun, but I have fun too.”
“…Wasn’t it hard? We did go through a lot.”
“They say life is hard. It’s meaningful because it’s hard.”
“Who told you that?”
“You did.”
Did I say that?
I barely remembered….
“So, I hope the time we spend together is meaningful to you too, Cheong. Is it meaningful?”
“Very much so.”
So much.
So very much that.
I even thought about staying here.
Even though I knew I had to leave this place both rationally and emotionally.
Even though I missed my mom so much.
Leaving this place was hard.
“Cheong.”
“Yeah.”
“Do you ever think about leaving us?”
The moment I heard those words.
My heart sank.
“Why would you say that?”
“Just. While making the color film this time, everyone must have thought the same.”
“Why?”
“Cheong, you always seem like someone who’s going to leave us. I know it’s a ridiculous thought. I know there’s no one more sincere to us than you. But sometimes, I get that feeling.”
I couldn’t answer.
“When I’m having a hard time, I run to you and whine…. But Cheong, you always come out here in the middle of the night to watch videos of us alone. Always. Alone.”
I had indeed been doing that for the past few months.
“Did everyone know?”
“Yeah.”
“Why did you pretend not to?”
“It’s weird. You come out alone just to watch our stage videos, concept films, and music videos…. So, we all just pretended not to know.”
I see.
I patted Yeon Juhong’s head.
How puzzled and scared they must have been.
Seeing their leader act strange.
“Sorry. I won’t do that anymore.”
“Hey. Doesn’t that mean watching these videos comforts you, Cheong?”
“That’s right.”
Was that it?
Had I unconsciously sought comfort in this?
Under the guise of monitoring, was I unconsciously doing that?
I laughed, “Haha.”
“Then I hope you keep watching. I want you to find comfort in Cheong Cheong.”
“You give me a lot of comfort, too.”
“But it feels a bit lacking….”
Yeon Juhong sighed deeply.
“Cheong Cheong, you need to finish your contract period with us, renew it, and stay with us. Got it?”
“Yeah. I got it.”
“When we’re old grandmothers, we should still do dinner shows with the Eveerblue.”
“We should.”
“It’s a promise.”
“Yes, a promise.”
“A promise….”
Only then did Yeon Juhong fall asleep on my shoulder.
Unable to get up, I continued watching the members’ videos.
The weight of that promise was so heavy.
It felt like I would never be able to get up again.
Personal Special Abilities:
Celebrity (87/100)
Fan Service (82/100)
(New!) Visual Directing (71/100)
[Your member has developed a new ability.]
[How about nurturing this newly discovered talent?]
Even the notification window that made my heart ache more heavily weighed down on my feet.
“You have a personal favor to ask?”
The next morning.
I was running with Baek Juha.
While jogging in the morning.
I was about to ask Baek Juha a very difficult favor.
“Yes. It’s a personal favor… It’s okay if you can’t do it.”
“Why wouldn’t I do it? Of course I will, as long as it’s not something strange.”
“It is a bit strange, though.”
At my words, Baek Juha’s expression twisted subtly.
“Don’t tell me, you want me to do something immoral…?”
“…It’s not that.”
This person had an overly active imagination in unnecessary directions.
“I’d like you to find out about someone.”
“Someone?”
A voice leaked out in surprise.
“Her name is similar to yours. Baek Nokha….”
“….”
Baek Juha’s expression gradually hardened.
“She’s my age… I don’t know if she’s alive or dead. If she were alive, she might have tried to enter the entertainment industry. And… though this isn’t certain, she might have lived in 00-dong.”
I recited all the information I had about 21-year-old Baek Nokha from my world.
It wasn’t certain if the Baek Nokha of this world lived the same life, so all the information was uncertain….
But just in case.
“I’ll look into it.”
“Thank you.”
“But Cheong-ah.”
“Yes.”
Baek Juha asked me with a tense expression.
“Why do you want to find out about this person?”
Why?
Why….
“It’s….”
I hesitated for a moment before answering.
“She was a friend I was once close to. I miss her.”
I swallowed the reason I couldn’t say: I wanted to find any clue that could keep me in this world a little longer.