Chapter 67: Rank 11 (7)
‘Is it a coincidence? Or not?’
That was Harang’s first thought when he met the Middle-aged Beggar.
It was the same when he first set foot in Marzen.
And it was the same when he gained enlightenment while teaching swordsmanship to the Eddy Family.
Now too, the situation was exquisitely timed.
A situation where his mind was much more complicated than usual due to various matters.
Thinking that he had encountered the Middle-aged Beggar again at such a time, it felt like this was not a coincidence but fate.
Of course.
‘……There’s nothing particular to talk about.’
He didn't have anything particular to say to the Middle-aged Beggar.
At other times, he might have exchanged some trivial jokes, but now his head was heavy, as if it would burst from worry.
He quickly walked past the old man sitting in a corner of the alley.
No, he was about to.
“I’m in a very good mood today.”
“……”
“A beggar’s good mood day isn’t that common. Do you know how hard it is to live by begging every day? You wouldn’t know. Bending your waist all day is an ordeal, and kneeling is even harder. Sometimes, the money gathered so diligently is snatched by ruffians, and on such days, one has to starve for two whole days. Fortunately, such incidents have decreased significantly since the Eddy Family turned into a Mercenary Corps. In a way, it can be said to be thanks to you.”
“……What do you want to say?”
In the end, Harang, unable to ignore the voice, turned around to face the Middle-aged Beggar.
At that, the old man grinned.
Unlike usual, his appearance, sitting cross-legged with his back straight, felt quite dignified.
He said.
“Since I’m in a good mood, I’d like to bestow something upon you.”
“Bestow?”
“Why. Can’t a beggar bestow something on others? My, my, I thought you were an unprejudiced person, but I was quite mistaken.”
“No, it’s not like that…… Never mind. So what are you planning to bestow?”
Harang, who was about to say something, swallowed his thoughts.
He wondered what a person with nothing could bestow, but frankly, he was also curious.
In a way, his continued pretense of friendship towards him, who was in a similar situation to a thug, and his insistence on giving him something beyond that.
Yes, let’s hear what on earth he plans to give.
Harang, thinking so, slowly approached the old man, and he, with an even more solemn expression, gestured for him to sit in front of him.
Harang did as he was told.
It was because he felt that wandering the streets aimlessly like this wouldn't solve his worries, and surprisingly, words that seemed to have grasped his situation flowed from the old man's mouth.
“I, as a life Senior, will give you some counseling.”
“……”
“Why that reaction? Can’t a beggar counsel others?”
“Uh…… I’m flustered. Counseling, all of a sudden?”
It was true.
Harang was extremely flustered.
Of course, considering he was a beggar with nothing, it was somewhat understandable.
Giving advice was something anyone could do, regardless of wealth.
What surprised Harang was that the old man seemed to have seen through his complicated inner thoughts.
Otherwise, why would he suddenly offer life counseling like this?
Just then, the old man added another word with a mischievous smile.
“Why, surprised? As if I’ve seen into your heart?”
“……A little, yes.”
“It’s nothing remarkable. No, anyone could tell by looking at your face. A person who always walks around expressionless is making an incredibly serious face, so one can’t help but feel that you have some worries.”
“Ah……”
“Alright, alright. Let’s cut the chatter. Anyway, all I, who have nothing, can bestow are a few words. Even those might not be much help, but please accept them.”
“Why are you going to such lengths?”
“Didn’t I say it earlier? Thanks to the Eddy Family changing their profession, the instances of money being stolen have decreased lately.”
“That’s something to thank the Eddy Family for……”
“You are also Eddy Family. In my eyes, that is.”
“……”
“Why, you don’t think so?”
“Honestly, I don’t know.”
Harang answered honestly.
Before, he would have definitely said no.
Unlike them, who had been stalwarts of Marzen for a long time, he was merely a stranger.
He was just a former Godok, barely adapting to the outside world.
However, now his thoughts had changed.
He wanted to be with them.
He wanted to be with them.
But he couldn't.
At least, until he resolved the worries filling his heart right now, it was difficult to face Eddy and the others.
Harang, who had thought this far, raised his head and looked at the Middle-aged Beggar.
Closer than the strangers passing him by, and farther than the Eddy Family with whom he had spent most of his time.
In a way, he felt like a suitable person to confide his heartfelt stories to.
Nodding, he slowly began to share his story.
“I am……”
* * *
By Harang’s standards, at least, there were three types of people in the world.
People who coerce others.
People who try to make deals with others.
Lastly, people he still couldn't quite understand, who tried to bestow something upon others without expecting anything in return.
The type of person Harang found most burdensome was, surprisingly, not type 1 but type 3.
He had experienced type 1 a lot from a young age.
Therefore, though he hated it, it wasn't something he couldn't deal with.
He could just hold onto it and repay it someday.
Type 2 was needless to say.
It was no different from buying things at the market, so it was naturally not applicable.
However, in the case of type 3, as mentioned before, they were beings incomprehensible by Harang’s common sense…… and therefore burdensome.
The reason he had quickly given up begging in the past was also due to that.
However, a while ago.
Harang had received an incredibly large favor from the Eddy Family without any expectation of return.
“No. It’s more absurd than that……”
“Absurd?”
“……They almost lost their lives because of me. And yet…… they didn’t resent me. Rather, they showed even deeper goodwill, kindness, and trust.”
That was right.
That was the decisive reason why Harang couldn't return to the Eddy Family.
At first, he didn't understand.
A little later, a feeling of gratitude welled up.
However, the last thought that came to mind was ‘heavy’.
It couldn't be helped.
For Harang, who felt awkward even receiving a meal and tried to do something to earn his keep, their hearts, rushing in without expectation of return, were heavier than anything in the world.
He didn't have the courage to embrace it.
Nor did he have the confidence to repay it.
Nevertheless, he had returned here because he wanted to be with them…… but even after worrying all the way to Marzen, no clear answer came to him.
“My story ends here.”
Harang, having finished his story, looked at the old man.
His gaze held a fervent emotion.
Indeed, what advice would the Middle-aged Beggar offer?
Hoping it would be a story he could accept, Harang’s gaze deepened even further.
From the mouth of the old man, who had been silent for a moment, unexpected words flowed.
“Become a beggar.”
“……Pardon?”
“I said, become a beggar.”
“What does that……”
“If receiving from others is scary, fearful, and heavy…… then how will you live in a world where people live together? In that case, it’s better to become a beggar. Someone who is more accustomed to receiving than anyone, who knows how to shamelessly get fed, who knows how to beg for help…… But the world doesn't expect anything from a beggar. How about it, wouldn’t such an existence be alright? You wouldn’t feel heavy-hearted even if you receive an opponent’s unrequited goodwill.”
“……”
“Why, not an answer you like?”
“Honestly, yes.”
Harang said, nodding his head.
The old man’s words were true.
No one who gives alms to a beggar expects their goodwill to be returned.
Therefore, a beggar was an existence that could receive something and beg most comfortably in the world.
However, just because that was enviable, was it truly right to envy and want to emulate an existence that couldn't achieve anything on its own?
No.
He had keenly realized that it was not right, that it didn't suit him, through his past experience as a beggar.
Harang would rather return to being a Godok than have any thought of becoming a beggar.
Did he know his determination?
The Middle-aged Beggar no longer forced his thoughts.
Instead, he smiled, revealing his yellowed teeth, and offered different advice.
“As expected, right? You don’t want to become a beggar, do you?”
“Yes.”
“I suppose so. Just because something is scary, you can’t give up everything and return empty-handed. Perhaps if you were an old and sick man like me, but you’re in your prime. Hmm, mmm. In that case…… make an effort.”
“Pardon?”
“Are you deaf? I said, make an effort.”
“What……”
Harang asked back with a dumbfounded expression.
Effort, out of the blue.
What did this mean?
However, the Middle-aged Beggar, after making a pathetic expression, shook his head and continued his explanation.
“You, you handle a sword well, right?”
“……I handle it not badly.”
“Right. But, you wouldn't have possessed your current swordsmanship skills from the beginning.”
“Of course not. I made my own efforts to reach this level.”
“That’s exactly it.”
“……?”
“Human relationships also require effort, you person.”
The Middle-aged Beggar, who scolded Harang with a frustrated expression, continued to speak.
“If you receive goodwill from someone for the first time, it can be bewildering. I understand completely. Some people might shamelessly take and take until the relationship breaks, and some, like you, might become distant because they’re too afraid of receiving too much. But, that’s natural. Just as it’s awkward and difficult when you first hold a sword, it’s natural for it to be like that when you first make friends.”
“……”
“Keep thinking about how you can form healthier relationships. Once you’ve thought about it, act, express…… and if there seems to be a problem in that process, think again, correct it, sometimes communicate, seek advice…… And so, just as you build up your swordsmanship, try to build up better human relationships. Don’t just worry, fear, and be anxious before you even start.”
“……”
“My words end here. Heh heh…… My, I’ve talked too much after a long time, I should go drink a bucket of water or something.”
With those last words, the Middle-aged Beggar left, and Harang continued to sit in that spot.
Ten minutes passed.
Thirty minutes passed.
Even after a full hour had passed, the black-haired young man couldn't leave his spot, like a rooted tree.
By the time he moved, the sky had already darkened, and it was time for the night Merchants to become active.
And a little later.
The Middle-aged Beggar, who heard the news that Harang had reunited with the Eddy Family, quietly muttered to himself.
“Heh heh…… Now he’s starting to show signs of having experienced the outside world a bit.”